Talking to myself

When I re-started the blog a few days ago, one thing that played on my mind was the audience or lack of it. Over the last few years, I had been indoctrinated incessantly over the need to line up messages to an audience. Writing without an audience, as with this blog, seemed to be a hark to the old days and the old ways.

It took a bit of an effort to shake that feeling. What helped was the time I spent re-designing the website, hosting the blog on my domain, and learning a bit of XHTML, CSS and Javascript to jazz up the place. Nothing is better than a bit of creativity and mental challenge to drive clarity.

That is when I realized that the joy in what I did on this blog was for me and me alone. Writing is something I liked to do, and this provided a means for me to instinctively fulfill that urge. The website provided me with a means to basically bring together stuff I did over time to one place. There was a definite satisfaction in seeing a project come to fruition, the beats having to pander (!?) to an audience.

As Krishna says in the Bhagwad Gita:

To action alone hast thou a right and never at all to its fruits; let not the fruits of action be thy motive; neither let there be in thee any attachment to inaction.

It is the joy of writing and working on my website that is my biggest gain. And thus I go, talking to myself.